Showing posts with label asshats. Show all posts
Showing posts with label asshats. Show all posts

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Get a Grip People!


My conservative friends need to get a dose of reality. Phil Robertson of Duck Dynasty is no more of a hillbilly redneck than Buddy Ebson was Jed Clampett. I’m sure his comments in GQ were a marketing ploy and if he is anything, he is a brilliant marketing man. The Robertson Family enjoying Martha's Vineyard
 
After the recall of Gray Davis here in California we elected Arnold Schwarzenegger governor. Too many people (mostly conservatives) thought we were electing Conan the Barbarian and he would swing his mighty sword and straighten out Sacramento overnight. It didn’t happen. Arnold even hung Conan’s sword on the wall of his office. It was a movie prop.
 

Some conservatives are excited by another strong man (I guess) Chris Christie the governor of New Jersey. He’s cut school budgets, bullied teachers, public employees and strong armed reporters. He’s rough, tough and ready to push around all those soft liberals. He’s also got the highest unemployment in the North East, he’s given tax breaks to money losing casino operations, he was charged by the US Attorney’s office for exceeding his travel and entertainment budget guidelines when he was  US Attorney for New Jersey and now the bridge scandal. Ever think he is maybe just another fat pant bully politician from New Jersey?
 

John Wayne was and is another conservative hero. Tough Marine hero, western cowboy hero, all around bad ass. Never served in the military, lived in Newport Beach California not on a ranch like you’d think Rooster Cogburn would. The worst thing you could hear in Basic training was “Cut that John Wayne shit out trooper.” He was a guy who made movies.
 
Ronald Reagan made training films during WWII, never left Hollywood. Nancy broke up his marriage to Jane Wyman. Go to the RR museum and gaze on pure un-adulterated fantasy land. Rough and tough Ronnie used an English saddle when he rode around his Santa Barbara Ranch all dressed up in his cowboy costume. He also lost 249 Marines in Lebanon (after being warned security wasn't any good) and got the hell out over night and then kicked ass in Grenada right?


Prep school cheer leader George W. Bush bought his ranch shortly before he ran for President, somebody taught him how to operate a chainsaw and he basically cut brush for 8 years.  The ranch was on the market and sold after he left office. Presumably his Ford F-150 and the chainsaw were part of the deal.


Roy Rogers was born in Chicago, Gabby Hayes was an Englishman and perennial virgin Doris Day was a big band singer. As Artie Shaw once said, “I knew Doris day before she was a virgin.” Charlton Heston wasn’t Moses, kids.
Your uncritical, magical thinking leads you to believe Obama is fascist-socialist-communist-Muslim-born in Kenya-weakest president ever who is stronger than Hitler. Get a grip people.

Whoops, I almost forgot you thought Mitt Romney was a guy who built businesses with his own hands and ingenuity.

Now some conservative “thought leaders” are championing Russia’s Vladimir Putin for his conservative values.   If Putin thought it would garner him support he’d take off his shirt, put his foot in the middle of Phil Robertson’s chest and rip that idiot beard out by the handful!
 

You people need to grow the fuck up! Check out Putin being the manly. conservative man before being photo shopped into the great outdoors.
 He could run for President and some of you'd vote for him. Probably win South Carolina hands down after he wrestles a couple of the other candidates into submission right on Fox News Live!

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Money Can't Buy Everything!

I've had gray hair since my 30's, white since my 40's. I think it came from my Grandmother's side of the family. My Dad's Mom was snow white when she was in her 20's.

On the advice of the woman who cut my hair at the Copley Plaza Hotel barber shop I colored my hair once when I was in my early 30's. When I got home, my kids who were 10 and 8 at the time broke into tears, my ex wife laughed and I never did it again! Believe me it was bad advice, very bad.

Check this out:


This is casino billionaire Sheldon Adelson, take a close look at his hair, the color doesn't exist in nature.

Another casino magnate, Steve Wynn, close to Adelson auburn, check out the plastic surgery and the teeth!





Auhnuld is moving toward the Adelson color palette as well!


Donald trump is in his 60's, not as bad as "shoe polish brown" but WTF? All you need to know about Trump's ego is this painting that hangs in the entry of Mar Lago, his Palm Beach home. (it doubles as a private club) I've seen it, it's huge and a lousy painting as well. Trump sells a reproduction of it for $1,100.



Here's Wayne Newton, shoe polish black hair, another favorite with old, egotistical men.


Whatever Wayne paid his plastic surgeon, it was way too much! I think the same guy did Mickey Rourke! Note the hair color.


I'd guess the same guy did Cher, too.


I think this highly skilled plastic surgeon, just bullshits his patients, he can only do one face. Newton, Rourke and Cher look like triplets.

Grow old gracefully, you asshats. You don't have enough money to purchase youth, it ain't for sale!